Dancing on my own
by meektester866
Summary: "They dance and Emily just keeps on smiling. They dance and you just stare at them." Paige comes back for prom. She knows she's going to get her heart broken, but she has to know, she has to see it with her own eyes. Set in 6x09. One-shot.


"Dancing on my own" by Robyn. You can also listen to the Glee version. What you prefer.

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 **Dancing on my own**

 _Someone said you got a new friend,  
does she love you better than I can?_

You already knew before you arrived at your old high-school, before you went to the Hastings's barn only to find it empty, before you got on that plane to come back to Rosewood. Hell, you knew even before Pru told you. You had this nagging feeling on your gut for quite some time before she confirmed it. You've called her, needing help on surprising Emily at prom, and she had a hard time telling you that she was dating someone; you just hung up on her. Even if you kind of already knew, it still hurt. Did she forget about you? You should have just ignored her when she told you not to come back. You should have come back.

You called Pru back a few days later apologizing for your reaction, she understood and told you not to worry. You told her that you still wanted to go to prom, you still wanted to see Emily. She moved the same objections your parents did when you told them what you were planning. You ignored their worries. You had to do this, it's all you've told them. And it was true, you had to be here. You need to know if that girl can give Emily everything she deserves, you need to know if she can love Emily in a way you couldn't – you don't think that's possible, you loved Emily wholly, you gave her your heart, your body, your soul. You gave her everything that you are.

 _I know where you're at,  
I bet she's around_

You spot Aria and Ezra dancing and you figure out that Emily can't be much distant. You see her a few seconds later. You find yourself breathless for a moment. She's absolutely stunning and breathtaking. Seeing her is like falling in love all over again. You smile in spite of yourself, you know you wouldn't change it for anything else in the world. Emily has always been just what you wanted. To you, she's always been perfect.

You wonder where this Sara girl is. You wonder why she's not dancing with Emily – you are tempted to go and just take her hand, so you could be dancing with her. One last dance. If you can't have her, not in the way she used to be yours, a last dance is all you can ask for. You work up the courage to go to her, but you wait too much and you lose your chance. Sara just arrived and Emily is smiling. They dance and Emily just keeps on smiling. It's not the smile she used to give you, to reserve for you and you only, but that's her bashful smile, the one she wears when she's flattered and you can't help but wonder what Sara could have said to her. They dance and you just stare at them.

 _Yeah, I know it's stupid,  
but I just gotta see it for myself_

You don't take your eyes off of them and you start to feel like a creep after awhile. But you have to know. You came here just to see them. You had to see with your eyes how you finally lost Emily. You never thought it would happen this way. You had hoped it would never happen in any way, but it had. And it hurts. It hurts so much. Your sight becomes blurred and you realize that you're crying. You don't even try to stop the tears. There's just no use. This is not what was supposed to happen to the two of you.

You lost Emily. You actually lost Emily. This time isn't like the others. There's no fear of coming out to blame, no broken trust, no separation. There's just a beaten up love, a love torn to pieces. You're just left alone on your knees with those little shreds escaping your fingers and flying away like they never really belonged to you.

 _I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her,  
I'm right over here, why can't you see me?_

You look away when their lips meet. You just stare at the bottom of your glass, you don't dare to look again. Those soft lips, the same who kissed every inch of your body making you feel so high that you could touch the sky, are not yours anymore. To stare. To kiss. To taste.

Emily is not yours to stroke, to hold, to kiss anymore. She's not yours to cheer on, to comfort, to love anymore. Emily isn't just yours anymore. Emily can't see you anymore. There's nothing you can do but say goodbye. You wonder how she is going to remember you. What you had is special. You don't want her to forget – you won't.

 _But you don't see me standing here,  
I just came to say goodbye_

Emily taught you a lot of things. She taught you how to love, she taught you how to let go. So that's what you're going to do. You let go. Of her. Of late swims. Of runs. Of riding bikes. Of stupid movies. Of karaoke nights. Of dances. Of sweet and gentle kisses. Of bites and marks. Of making love. Of unforgettable moments. Of hope. Of dreams. Of love. You just let go of everything.

But there's something you will always hold on to. Memories. If there's something that Emily hasn't taught you is how to forget. You can't forget. You don't want to forget. You're not able to. It's impossible to forget someone like her, someone who gave you so much to remember.

 _I keep on dancing on my own_

You give her one last look. You want to remember this moment. The moment everything ends. The moment you wish her the best, even if you're not the one to stand by her side. It doesn't matter who stands beside her, as long as she's happy. This is the last smile, the last goodbye.

You turn and walk towards the exit. You leave without looking back. You have to dance on your own. As you say goodbye and leave behind the life you had since this moment, you can't help but hope for the stars to bring you back together someday so you can have a last dance with Emily.

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 **Author's note:** I wanted to post it yesterday since it marked my first year on the website, but we know the problems the site had. Now that's fixed, here it is. I wanted to write Paily at prom, without going AU. This is the result. I always thought that Paige would have showed up at prom knowing how much Emily wanted to go - how much herself wanted to be there, but hey, Paige has been out of character all season 6A, so her not being present wasn't really a surprise. That's it. Let me know what you think.

 _Meek's out._


End file.
